• “House is alarmed”
• “Show anytime February 21 thru February 25 (observed on 8/3/13)”
• “This home is looking for a new owner with creativity and vision”
• “Bring your Hammer…not habitable”
• “seller will not recognize buyer’s personal home inspection reports and requests for repairs”
• “Bring your tool belt and elbow grease”
• “Very close to freeway access but far enough away to not hear the noise”
• “This canyon hill neighborhood is full of proud owners and a very clean street of homes”
• “New state of the art windows”
• Located on a coveted corner lot in the recent, yet established neighborhood”
• “Prepare to be amazed”
• “there’s room for play and special places to enjoy calm and peaceful relaxation”
• “park like backyard for your BBQ’s with your family and friend”
• “huge shop space 40×72.5 overhead doors heated”
• “Live like an Egyptian or at least live in a pyramid home like one”
• “This Bachelor is moving on”
• “Custom titled master bathroom”
• “Nice cute shed”
• “This home sparkles!”

And, the winner is:

AWESOME HOME WALK TO SCHOOLS OR DOWNTOWN (redacted) NEW PAINT INSIDE AND OUTSIDE NEW PAINT AND ROOF IN THE LAST 2 YEARS 2 STORAGE SHEDS FENCED IN BACK YARD LG LOT IN CULDESAC GARAGE IS REAL DEEP ON ONE SIDE RV PARKING AWESOME FRONT YARD WITH CURBING AND ROSES NEW CARPET IN 2 BEDROOMS WHOLE HOME FRESHLY CLEANED

(hmmmm  .  .  .  is this a run-on listing?) 🙂